I arrived home from the camp and was half in the bag.

Barbara started in on me about how I needed to be a little more productive in my free time, and that I was much too old to be drinking like this in the middle of the day.

“Listen, it couldn’t be helped.” I replied, “Bob, Will, and I were at the camp and in the process of trying to narrow down where we wanted to mount the new Mallard Inn Sign. The drinking was a direct result of old age.”

“Old age?” Barbara asked. “How did old age figure into you getting drunk?”

“Well, our hearing is just about gone,” I said. “You see, the 3 of us were outside walking around the camp when the following conversation took place.”

Bob said: “Windy, ain’t it?”

Will replied: “No, it’s Thursday.”

Ray said to Will: “So am I, Let’s have a beer.”

Bob said to Ray: “But, I don’t want to mount it here.”

Will said to Bob: “Yeah, I’d drink a beer.”

Ray said to Will: “You may be right, it would look better mounted on the peer.”

Bob said to Ray: “That’s a good idea, we should discuss this over a beer.”

“And that’s how the drinking started,” I told her